An old-fashioned American outhouse similar to Ernest's and Annie's

As a youngster, I remember going to Mrs. Annie’s and Mr. Ernest’s outhouse on the dairy farm to use the restroom.   The “restroom” was a wooden shack out back housing a wooden bench with a hole cut out in the accommodating shape and size of a human posterior.  The place smelled pretty rotten, reeking of hard-core feces and other excrement, but the Sears and Roebuck Catalog was right there on the bench to help you ignore the odor while you tended to business.  And as a youngster, the sound effects of “bombs away” splashing into the  bottom of  the deep hole  was fascinating.  After you finished studying the catalog’s listing of mail-order lawn mowers or underwear or garden hoses, you ripped out that page for the “handy-wipe” and “Presto!”  Done with the job.  No need to flush: you’d just drop the wipe down the hole, pull up your britches, and return to business.

Compare Mr. Ernest and Ms.Annie’s Early American arrangement to this modern commode Ann found in China.  This is one of the first pix that came back to us after she settled in over there in late May/early June.

A Chinese Commode, or a Chinese hole in theground hooked up to plumbing?

I honestly think I’d prefer the outhouse.  At least the bench was high enough to sit (rather than squat).  With this Oriental contraption, my imagination “feels” something wet and cold pressing against my bottom.  Ugh!

The experts claim that the Chinese economy is taking over our own in this global age. Hopefully, that takeover will not involve bathroom fixtures.  I’d return to Ernest and Annie’s outhouse, I believe, before squatting over this ceramic-lined hole in the floor.

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