I composed this silly piece on November 20, 1992 on the back of an English Department Chair bulletin from Lafayette High School, where I was employed.  No doubt the Christmas season coincided with the schools “Just Say No” to drugs emphasis.  Why I wrote this piece is a mystery: Idon’t recall the exercise or occasion.  But I found it in that early 90’s folder I ran across late last spring, and the piece is in my hand, so obviously am guilty of its composition.  Here’s wishing Santa an off-season of sobriety and freedom from addictive substances!

He's a cagey old cuss. Look at those glassy eyes!

Santa Clause, Santa Clause,

What do you smoke in that pipe?

Is it coke? Or grass? Or crack?

It’s just not right that you should fly so high

After your sleigh descends from the sky!

 My little brother wants to know—

He wants to tell you “Just say no!”

You’re a role model, you see,

To little kids like him and me.

So you’d better watch out, you’d better not doubt

That I’ll call the narcs to bust you out!